I haven’t posted for a long time, mostly because I can vent my rage on X/Twitter, and partly because I’ve started a long post on the economic record of Labour governments. It’s a topic that books have been written on, but I wanted to do a summation to see where the public idea that Labour’s heart is in the right place but they can’t run the economy is justified comes from. It’ll take a while, and I’m also spending time improving my French and learning the guitar. Yes, not a good excuse, I know.
In the meantime, I wish you a happy new year and pass to you a brief note on silly memes from TV detectives (what has become called “cosy crime”):
- Interviewing suspects or witnesses when walking down the street. Eh ?
- Interviewing suspects, witnesses or informants whilst others are present. Eh ? Eh ?
- Suspects who say, when interviewed by the police, “you’ll never prove it”. A more stark admission of guilt I’ve never seen – has any suspect ever said that ? Wouldn’t it, in any case, make detectives even more determined to nail him ?
- Suspect laughs unconvincingly. Who does this when accused of a serious crime ?
- Suspect says “This meeting is over” and walks away. Does that happen ? Can you do that, even if you declare beforehand (another meme) “I’m a very busy man”.
- Suspect asks “why would I ?”. Doesn’t happen.
- Detective has medical condition that requires pain-killers which are taken without water. I can’t do that. Can you ?
- Interviewee carries on playing snooker/pool/cards whilst being questioned.
- Locked door is charged down on the third attempt. Never the second, never the fourth. Third. Always.
- When escaping from the villains, a couple are slowed when the woman twists her ankle. Male ankles, I can assure you from personal experience, are perfectly capable of twisting. Nice to know this never occurs when pursued by gangsters/foreign agents/serial killers.
- Hiding behind a car door when under attack. Plenty of tests tell you that doesn’t stop the feeblest gunfire.
- One inch of whisky seems to be a satisfying drink that lasts a while.
That’s enough for now. All further contributions welcome; there must be thousands.
Grumpy Wisdom 